"i dont know man. i am the only really funny one around anywhere so i should probably be the only one quoted."
"i dont know man. i am the only really funny one around anywhere so i should probably be the only one quoted."
"The worst thing anyone can do, to me, is tell me I am funny. I become puddy in that person’s hands."
"I don’t like reading.” - Sean
“Why not?” - Kerri
“I don’t like information.” - Sean"
"I used to do that thing where I’d imagine condiments on my food. It was actually a phase in my life for four to six weeks. I’d go to sporting events and there’d be a really long line for condiments so I’d use ‘taste memory’ to imagine that there was ketchup on my hot dog or mustard on my pretzel."
"My wife dated a guy in Ireland for five years before dating me. He was her first choice."
"I’ve had a rough morning. I had to go to the doctor to have blood taken away from me."
"Fuck Ari!"
"The girl who received my bone… is very happy."
"I can’t believe I’m married. So many women throw themselves at me now and what am I going to do? Nothing."
"I literally was trying to impress a girl. She was working at the drive for it. She became my girlfriend for a year and a half."
On why he got swabbed for the National Bone Marrow Registry in 2003.
